I’m sure that all of you fathers out there know what I’m talking about before I even start. What do you do when mommy is doing the kid’s hair? I mean, yes, we could engulf ourselves in the process and even help out. Nahhh. It’s better just to let them have that time together and find something else (non)productive to do.

So I’ve develop a quick top ten list to help when you are trying to decide what to do during that alloted time. Here goes nothing:

  1. Run to the store to get some  more diapers and milk. You know you need some.
  2. Take a bath. Do you even remember the last time you took a nice hot bath? Yup, me neither.
  3. Hop on the treadmill and actually go faster than “2.5”. Work of those donuts you copped on the way to work this morning (stinking Krispy Kreme drive-thru!)
  4. Cut the grass. The neighbors would really appreciate it. And while you’re at it, plant some seed in those bare spots along the driveway where you’ve consistently parked your car.
  5. Go through your closet and give away everything that’s more than 10 years old. Why? You can’t fit it anyway.
  6. Go to the store and buy some more clothes Why? You just gave all of your good ones away.
  7. Do some sit ups. Come on son, you know what I’m talking about. That gut area has increased exponentially since the baby was born, admit it.
  8. Get on Facebook/Twitter and tell all of your friends/followers what you are doing… which is nothing. Because that’s all we are really doing when we update our status. Nothing.
  9. Go ahead and eat that bag of Orville Redenbacher’s Movie Theater Butter flavored Gourmet Popcorn now. It’s probably better to get it over with at 7pm rather than your usual 10pm time slot. And last, but certainly not least…
  10. Make the wife happy. Go shopping for the anniversary/Valentine’s Day/birthday gifts and cards now. This will put you way ahead and you can avoid those last minute-the dog ate it-I’ve been so busy at work it slipped my mind-I thought we weren’t exchanging gifts this year-over priced flowers because you ordered them the day before-isn’t my love enough moments!!

That should be a good enough list, but feel free to chime in with your ideas in the comment section (you too mommies).

By | 2010-04-09T17:40:24+00:00 April 9th, 2010|Daddy's Corner, Funny, Top Ten|